Loud and clear!

I’VE never been one for superstitions, but the events of the morning of October 1 gave me pause to consider if I should take them more seriously.

Apparently on that morning – and on every first day of the month – one is supposed to chant ‘White Rabbits’ in the morning to ward off any bad luck.

I, of course, forgot to, so was duly woken at 6.30 by the cats (Genghis, Vader and 50 Shades) demanding their breakfast.

When I got to the cupboard, I realised that I was out of cat food and faced with three increasingly frantic and famished felines I had to placate them with a rather nice bit of salmon I was planning to have that evening.

Grumbling to myself, I shuffled into the shower, only for the boiler to go ‘phutt’ just as I had soaped myself up and leaving me with no option except for a cold shower.

Muttering darkly I headed back into the bedroom at pace, only to catch my little toe on the end of the double bed, snapping it back.

Forget, ‘In space, no one can hear you scream’. In the campo around my house on the lake my shriek of pain must have startled the wildlife in a ten-mile radius.

Two weeks later and I’m still sporting an interesting flip flop and trainer combination, as my toe is still throbbing. What’s worse, the cats have now developed a taste for smoked salmon…

Sweet Dreams

I’ve been having trouble sleeping recently. Something to do with the whooshing sound of deadlines as they whistle past me, not just my throbbing toe.

So I decided to pop down to my local farmacia to get something to help me sleep.

Great places your average farmacia. One in Marbella in the 80s was maintained by a chemist so good at diagnosis that she was nicknamed The Witch Doctor.

But I digress. I walked up to the chap behind the counter and boldly asked for some ‘pasteles para dormir’.

He looked at me blankly and burst out laughing, “You mean ‘pastillas’ – tablets, not ‘pasteles’ – cakes?” Before adding: “I do however know a guy who can make you a cake to help you sleep!”

Suited and Booted

I was Master of Ceremonies at the Marbella International Film Festival last weekend. The coast has recently attracted some genuine Hollywood glamour with the visits of Brad and Angelina, Eva Longoria and supposedly George Clooney.

Unfortunately none of these A-listers were at the ceremony (no-one from Towie even turned up), but at least it gave me the opportunity to get my Black Tie out.

The last time I was asked to help out at an A-list function was when an international jewelery firm launched a range in Puerto Banus. There was a huge show with lights, live music and great lighting plus the beautiful people of Marbella and Madrid.

I was very excited when the event company got in touch and asked me to help out. So you can imagine how thrilled I was when I turned up on the night and they asked me to organise the parking.